Revelations in a Cop Car

Last night I spent two hours in a police car, the K-9 unit to be exact. Before you start wondering what misdemeanors I could have violated let me assure you - I never get caught! This ride was for different purposes. My journalism teacher insisted that we take a jaunt around the city with a police officer and then write a paper about it. What was supposed to be about Rexburg's finest turned into a paper of revelations.

Before I met with Officer Hirschi (pronounced, Hershey, like the candy) I started thinking of all the questions I was going to ask him. Living in a secluded town of small population and an overly predominate religion (Mormons) I knew that we wouldn't see much action; this was going to be like taking a ride along in Mayberry.

Officer Hirschi and I met in the back of the police station at 9pm. The sun held onto its last chance of light before giving up in favor of the night. Right away I could see why this officer chose the K-9 unit as he seemed to have a preference of dogs to people. That wasn't nearly as surprising as we appeared to be about the same age, which made me a little less nervous that I was going to do or say something to offend him. I still held onto some anxiety that I might take a picture of something that's confidential or hit the siren button on accident.

We started the night with an odd form of repetition: question, answer, silence. Question, answer, silence.
"How long have you been a police officer," I asked, too worried that maybe the slang of 'cop' would be seen as too common or something.
"7 years"
Silence.
"Is anyone else in your family in law enforcement?"
"My dad."
Silence
the only comment Hirschi mustered on his own without probing was, "This is going to be a long night."

I kept my constant desire I have, to hear my own voice, muted. The stream of voices on the police scanner filled the car with codes that meant nothing to me, but I didn't want to interrupt them. They all held different importance to the policeman next to me and I didn't want him to miss something important.

I suppressed my logorrhea for as long as I could, but began monologing; mostly about how I couldn't wait to move out of Idaho. Lord love and bless these people, but the culture here is such of a mold that I don't want to press myself into. Of course, I said everything with the assumption that this officer was Mormon as well. He stopped me mid-ramble and said, "We are on two different sides of the spectrum. I'm not Mormon."

In our greatest difference we found common ground. And the evening changed.

I grew up being the minority, religion wise, in a small town with molds of its own. I knew exactly what it felt like having my beliefs constantly questioned by those around me. Hirschi was now in the boat I jumped ship from years ago.

The pattern: question, comment, silence, excused itself and allowed conversation to take over. It turns out; we had more interesting things to say! Even the streaming of codes over the radio took a back seat. Hirschi opened up about his wife and how she's a successful real estate closer. They have three children of all different races. Their youngest they just adopted from Texas. He would show me pictures and I soaked in every story. Then, Hirschi told me what it was like for him to be a cop and different things he'd seen and done. He told me about finding college students cannoddling in church parking lots and we laughed at the irony behind it.

As the evening ended quicker then it began, I hopped out of the car and thanked Officer Hirschi for the experience. He smiled and joked that I better drive slowly home so he wouldn't have to give me a ticket.

For the rest of night, where I was still awake, I tried to remember what sparked the change in our drive along. What switched our view of one another? Then all at once it hit me: I was able to know the man behind the badge when I stopped talking to the badge and started talking to the man! Everything I had prepared before our drive could have been answered by any policemen or women in the station. I hadn't prepared for the actual person I was going to be meeting.

How many times in our lives have we done this? We go talk to the nurse, the teacher or the boss without realizing that there are people behind that profession. They all have favorite TV shows, beloved family and friends all outside of their careers. And they want to be viewed as people, as we all do.

I learned that night that there's a reason God didn't just leave the idea of people on paper, we were all meant to be seen in different dimensions.

Money is like Manure

When you figure out what occupation you want you're supposed to find a matching major to study. But what if what to become isn't close to what's being offered at your university. Or any Universities for that matter.

I'm going to be a Professional Philanthropist. What kind of classes am I supposed to sign up for that?! I could take business, but I'm interested in the making of the money only the spending. There's always economics, but the numbers are for the banks to sort out, not me. I've decided to keep with my communications degree because shopping always comes in second to talking.

Do not misunderstand me: I don't want the money for myself. I'm not a spoiled brat...alright I am spoiled, but I'm not a brat about it. I have bigger plans for the dough then just fabulous shopping sprees.

First: I'll buy up one hotel in every major city and transform them into Half-Way houses for families; ones who have lost their jobs or fallen on hard times and a need good clean place to stay while they get back on their feet. I'll stock each place with healthy meals and teach culinary classes so the people living there will have an opportunity to learn a new skill while providing a service for others.

Second: I'm going to buy up the best ad agencies and PR reps from all over. They will be my personal team of experts who will choose 100 small businesses (mom and pop shops) give the owners free services. This way their business will grow and get costumers coming in regularly. Every year we'll work with a brand new group of business owners until they can stand on their own two feet.

Third, well I can go on, but I want to keep these blogs short-ish. I guess you can say my dream in life is to make other's dreams come true. And it may sound "Pollyanna-esc" but I honestly believe that since my intentions are so pure that somehow I will find away to get finances sufficient enough to do it. Let's round up this week with 2 great quotes:

King Benjamin: "If God...grant unto you whatsoever ye ask that is right, in faith, believing that ye shall receive, O then, how ye ought to impart of the substance that ye have one to another."

Dolly Levi: "Money, pardon the expression, is like manure. It's not worth a thing unless it's spread around, encouraging young things to grow."

Now it's your turn- leave a comment or an email answering the question, if you had millions upon millions how would you give it back to your fellow brothers and sisters?

Take Me to Your Leader

At one point in my life I was in a deep conversation about leaders and the difference between a good one and one you plot to mutiny against. It was then that my friend defined something that had stuck with me. He said, "A leader is truly great when you are following them without realizing it."
The idea is comforting and horrifying all at the same time. If you are molding your life after those who've made honest decisions than the idea of being lead without knowing is a happy thought. Your leader is taking you down paths of happiness. But what if you're following a leader who doesn't have your best interests in mind. And you have no way of stopping the downhill process because you are in such a hurry to follow that you can't see the rope that's tied to you!

Hmm, the best way to describe this is with a Star Wars metaphor.

Anakin Skywalker starts out in life as we all do - with loads and loads of potential. He's then swept up by the good guys and put on a track to help out the entire universe. Does that happen? Nope! Sweet little Anakin turns into a whiny teenager and starts listening to Chancellor Palpatine and gets completely taken over by the dark side before he even notices. Anakin Skywalker becomes Darth Vader and the Chancellor reveals himself as Emperor Palpatine (the wrinkly guy in movies 4,5,6)

Are some of us dark side bound? I think so, but we don't realize we're on the trip until we've reached our destination. Is this why Christ said we're like sheep? Sheep are so easily led by anyone and anything. I don't like to think that I'm a sheep, but as long as I keep looking up to see the leader of the pack it should keep me on the right track.

Take some time today to look at who is your shepherd. It's never too late to grab your light-saber and follow someone else.

Frienimes aka a destruction of our society

Frienimes: adj. a word used to describe a set of people who act with congenial manners to your face, but in reality seek your destruction

The idea of "frienimes" has been around since the dawn of time. Cautioned of in the ancient religious texts, made comical through great literature, and now accepted? Where did we go wrong? How is it that such a generation of frienimies had crept into our midst?

When pondering this plunder I couldn't see a definite beginning until I analyzed its roots. In the case of all annoying childish behavior it started off with good intentions. It can be seen as a form of tolerance, even though you hate the person you're sweet to their face. The twist in the good nature comes when after you're nice in person you have no problem thinking the worst of them and, at every chance, spreading every bit of salacious gossip behind their back. Remember middle school? Yeah, it's like that except now grownups do it to. Lovely.

What it comes down to is that it's lying. And how do we remedy this? (because I do not advocate complaining about problems without some sort of attempted solution) The healing process is two-fold because we are dealing with two-faced people. First you need to remember that advice your parent/guardian taught you, 'if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say anything at all.' Apply this to all interpersonal connections. When you see a person you don't like, and interaction is inevitable, think if a true and honest statement to say to them. "Nice.....shoes." or "I had a nightmare about zombies last night. I hate zombies." Anything, but don't lie. They probably already know you don't really care for them and will see you more as a fake person. Only Barbie and Dolly Parton revel in being fake.

The second half comes from Eleanor Roosevelt: "Intelligent people talk about ideas, mediocre people talk about events, dumb people talk about people." Thank you Eleanor.

I think the constant need to stain others comes from deep self loathing. Um, get over yourself. And find a new topic to talk about beside your frienimes. Hey, if my 10 yr old cousin can understand this and find something better to converse about, than I have faith that you can as well. Set the example and be the norm you want in others.

Ditch the frienimes. Who has time for them anyway?

In the Beginning

As I sat in yet another journalism class on yet another day of college in yet another on going week of life I realized something: I didn't want to be there.

When we reach the pivotal moments of our lives is the choices we make in that moment that matter most. Because which way we turn on our paths of life turns us into who we are.

So here were my options:

1. Pack up life, drive to familiar territory, and start again
or
2. In the inspired words of Tim Gun, "Make it work"

A cheeseburger, fried friends, and half a pack of Oreos later I came to the conclusion to stop wishing and to get writing. My favorite thing to do in life is to talk. And I'm good at it. Since no one will give me a tv camera or my own talk show (yet, Oprah is leaving next year) this will work perfectly.

So here it is world, The Darling View. A place to talk about the latest fashion, controversy, and the fabulous life that surrounds all of us! Keep in mind that I encourage you to write me with your ideas or questions to: thedarlingview@gmail.com

The world is full of secrets and I keep them! :)